My my my.

You know that commercial about pot where the girl who smokes it is a deflated human sitting limply on the couch and her friend says that pot did it to her? It's a good commercial. And it's how summer colds feel, I have decided. Yes, I have a sore throat/sniffly nose/congested head and it is 100 degrees outside. I decided while sitting at a traffic light today that I felt utterly deflated like the pot girl -- due to the heat and my crappy immune system. Oh good times! It's not a bad cold, though, so I'll live.

I get to go to San Antonio this weekend to see my cousin graduate from Air Force boot camp. I'm really proud of him. It's not something I could do. Like, maybe I could if I devoted the next 6 months of my life to training, but really. We all know that's not going to happen. And he decided he was gonna do it...and he did! So we'll celebrate with Pirates of the Carribean and Sonic, as per his request. I'll make him a card. Yay! And my other cousins are driving in, so it's a family affair.

I think I need to get off my butt. And do stuff. Having a cold does not help.

Also, Lisa -- I gave you a shoutout in the middle of Ashley's blogathon (somewhere in there) for your birthday! Good luck finding it, hahaha. But Happy Late Birthday from this blog too. You're a good kid and I'm lucky to have signed up for that class with you many moons ago. :)

P.S. I have a noticeable eye twitch. Is that a cold symptom? Or an "I need a job" symptom? Can we cure this?

Feast or Famine

Isn't it strange how life ebbs and flows around us, and we usually crave whatever tidal phase is the farthest from returning. When it's winter, I crave blasting summer heat. And here now in the bowels of summer, I cannot wait to be enveloped by cold air when I walk outside. When I seemingly have no social life around me, I can't stand being in my apartment alone. When about 8 million things pop up, I freak out and want to sleep. Some days I have dreams of walking over to Target and dropping $100, but when I actually walk into the store, an intense frugality overwhelms me and I go home empty-handed.

All of this is cool, it's neither good nor bad I think -- as long as we're aware that these extreme times are just that...things that could never last. I try to keep my temperment in the middle. Those of you know me well know this breaks down with ridiculous consequences sometimes, usually resulting in a trip to the store for pumpkin cookies, haha. But really, on my headstone, I hope one of the things inscribed on it is: "That's Jana. She was pretty even keel."

The specs:

Currently working on: cleaning my apartment because Heather is coming!
Listening to: Teatro by Willie Nelson
Reading: Manhunt: The 12-Day Chase for Lincoln's Killer
Putting Off: Paying the electric bill.

Life Itself

So while I have had the awesome advantage of...not working for a while (too long), I have found that it takes a lot of effort to simply excel at this every day mundane process of living. Maybe it's because I have had too much time to focus on it, but I really don't think it is possible to be a successful human in terms of everything you have to do to just be kind of healthy and outgoing and responsible and whatever. It seems that if I go jogging one day, I forget to drink my 8 freaking glasses of water. Or I spend all day runnings errands and my apartment looks like crap. It's one giant game of catch-up all the time, and I find it exhausting.

Which leads me to believe that the true joy in life is not in these little things. It's in other little little things. Like Diet Coke. Screw you, water. ;)

Glorious.

Haha yeah. I guess if I only have one cranky post a week I'm doing ok. ;) I don't even mean the last post to be cranky, more of an observation. (The alcoholic part, that is*).

So yesterday I got to meet some fine people, hang out at a gorgeous North Austin park (more like a wildlife preserve is you ask me, but they call it a park), and play music for a neighborhood association BBQ cook-off. Thaaat's right. That meant that MULTIPLE people cooked BBQ and made enough to share. I even got to be a judge, so I tasted 3 kinds of chicken and 2 kinds of brisket. The clear winner in my book was chicken with this...luscious, sweet, sticky sauce that seemed to have been in the oven for about 6 years to achieve the perfect balance of sauce, juice, and meat. Gah. I was quite pleased. I am still stuffed.

I got paid in cabbage. No, really. :) I played for tips and sold CDs and then the nice family who got me involved in it all sent me home with a cabbage that had been grilled in tin foil. It's tasty! I'm using that as a story for many gigs to come, so be forewarned.

Also, this week I sang karaoke. TO MY OWN SONG. That was weird. My karaoke-queen buddy who booked me for an hour slot last week has a penchant for "My Best Guess." So when I showed up at karaoke night to observe the madness, she insisted I sing my own song...over myself...well, bizarre. Oddly fun. I'm not changing my act to pure karaoke, though. ;) I think the audience mostly thought "This is not Destiny's Child. We want Destiny's Child!" Next time I'll just do Bootylicious.

* JUUUUST KIDDING.

The Grid

I am so off the grid. The Grid is my new favorite term for "in touch" and "aware." I have no clue what is going on back where I used to live. My mom references things and I'm like "Huh?" and she's all "Oh yeah, thaaat." I piece together random events and happenings in my friends' lives through freaking Myspace messages.

Oh yeah, and yadda yadda you chose it, you moved away, you have "something" to "prove" in "Texas." Well whatever. Maybe we'll meet up in 5 years and stare awkwardly at each other and say "What have you been up to?" and chat and I'll have 6 beers because I'll probably be an alcoholic by then and we'll go back to our respective "grids" and "chill" and I'll work on my annoying practice of using "quotation marks" some more.

Oh and if you're reading this, it's not about you. ;) I guarantee that.

Now I will go play music for free food.

Koozies

So, in New Mexico, I used to marvel at the existence of the "koozie." Those squishy things, usually advertising something, that you slip your can of beer/coke in. What was their purpose? Why would you want to add weight to your beverage? To make it more msyterious, every Texas artist I liked (and subsequently looked around for merchadise for) sold koozies. You never see Madonna koozies. Or, more locally...Jana and Ben koozies. Because people would look at us weird.

Fast forward to my (almost) 2 months here and I GET IT. Ok, humidity gods. I understand that when you take something that is mildly chilled out of the fridge, let it sit out for 2.5 seconds, a pool of condensation as deep as the Rio Grande (haha) will form. I also understand it is cool, in Texas, to show your allegiance to your favorite Texas artists when you drink. It's brilliant marketing, really. So yes. I have busted out my Terri Hendrix koozie. And I drink with pride.

Getting it together.

Sorry for the whine post below. Sometimes necessary. Things are looking up, though. Maybe because I suvived Monday and it is now 6 whole days until another Monday comes around. :) As Lisa said, sometimes you have to do a list to make your blog happy:

- I have bug bites on my ankle. It disturbs me. They itch a little.

- Cheesecake flavored Jello pudding is so NOT cheesecake, but it costs about 1/56 what cheesecake costs, and has about 1/43rd the calories.

- I ran out of milk. This is bad for a cereal luvr.

- I am writing my first song in an alternate tuning!!! DADGAD. It makes me uber-happy.

- I am also experimenting with slide guitar. Watch out, Bonnie Raitt. Not.

- It is 102 degrees outside.

- It is inexplicable how children take out life's frustrations on their mothers. "Mooooooooom I don't even care that it rained there. I have no job. Gawwwwwd." Heehee.

- I have renter's insurance!!!

- I want money.

Mmmph.

Well. I got turned down for one job this week and interviewed for another today, but they won't be getting back to me for a few weeks. And when they do get back to me, it will probably be a big fat "no." Oh, wait. I mean...flowers are in bloom and squirrels are running around and it's charming everywhere.

No, life's ok. I just hate the interview/rejection process. It's like a new act of desperation every time you make contact with a person who has the simple employment you seek. Plus I don't know what I want to do. With myself. At all.

In the meantime, I'm at a coffeehouse listening to some killer songwriters so it's all dang ok.

These Meme Things.

Stolen from Lisa, the Cool One.

1. Yourself: unemployed and pathetic
2. Your boyfriend/girlfriend: taking his damn sweet time
3. Your hair? ponytailed
4. Your mother? cool
5. Your Father? chill
6. Your Favorite item? my geetar
7. Your dream last night: i rarely remember them
8. Your Favorite drink: coffee
9. Your Dream Car: fuel efficient (nerd)
10. The Room You Are In: coffeehouse-chic
11. Your Ex: mmph
12. Your fear: poverty and failure
13. Where do you want to be in 10 years: making cash happily
14. Who you hung out with yesterday? the cool person who booked me and Fred
15. What You’re Not: EMPLOYED
16. Your Best Friend: my bed
17. One of Your Wish List Items: a gig
18. What makes you happy: gigs
19. The Last Thing You Did: went to choir practice
20. What You Are Wearing: jeans and a thrift store t-shirt i lurve
21. Your Favorite Weather: autumn
22. Your Favorite book: The Tao of Willie
23. The Last Thing You Ate: pancakes for dinner
24. Your Life: stop and go
25. Your Mood: resigned
27. What are you thinking about right now: the live music i am about to watch/hear
28. Your Crush: you (good one, lisa)
29. What are you doing at the moment: i should be proofreading
30. Your summer schedule: hahaha thereof.

New

I can't pay my rent
Every dollar I've saved is a dollar I've spent
I'm still hellbent
On gettin' rid of it all so I can die content

Brand new town
No, I wasn't born here, but I can burn it down
I got a thorn in my crown
Cuz the last one I left didn't want me around

I wanna say that I'm passing on through
I won't miss you enough to stay
That the pressure on my chest is just altitude
But it's too soon to say too late
Too soon to say too late

This world's passing me by
But I can only pass one car at a time
It's a shameful crime
How ordinary it is outside

Nothing happens on this street
All the neighbors sit out just smokin' fireweed
What's the cost of my need?
Can you measure a life-worth in gasoline?

I wanna say that I'm passing on through
I won't miss you enough to stay
That the pressure on my chest is just altitude
But it's too soon to say too late
Too soon to say too late

Small Town Americana

She tried really hard and it was cute.
Originally uploaded by Czech Girl.

Hey kids. What's up? I'm recovering from a giant slice of small town fun...namely, the 58th Annual McDade Watermelon Festival. McDade (pronounced "MAC-day-eeeeed") is a little mapdot about 60 miles east of Austin, and some buddies invited me out for a day of wandering in the sun staring at watermelons. It was a grand time. We watched the parade down Main Street, ate BBQ (yeah!), and took in the scenery. Two fun events:

- Seed spitting contest: the cute little girl above needs a bit more oomph in that spit. ;)
- Chicken Hit Bingo. What, you ask? Well, they mark off a large cage into squares, give everyone bingo cards, and put a chicken in the cage. Then they wait for it to poop. Then whoever gets bingo with the accumulated chicken poop squares wins. I'm pretty sure someone had a lot of time on their hands for that one. Also I renamed it "Chicken (s)Hit Bingo."

The travesty: I actually did not eat any watermelon at the Watermelon Festival. I was too busy with BBQ.

Otherwise, got my fingers crossed on a job interview. I saw some awesome music last week. I hope to see more this week. I play a gig Wednesday. I got a job proofreading stuff online. It won't be lucrative but it might cover my weekly gas expenses. One hopes (oh, the costs of travel!) Speaking of which, I must go proof. Tell me about yourselves.

Feelin' Independent

Happy (late) 4th o' July! Fireworks...they never get old. I got to partake in watermelon, hamburgers, and apple pie at the invitation of some very nice people I just met, and we found a spot outside of town to watch a fireworks display -- in the rain. It was weird. Umbrellas and the smell of smoke in the air. Happy Birthday, America.

Um I got a gig. Next week at Baby A's which is a pretty decent restaurant / music venue (although every place in this town has a stage attached to it). That's pretty cool. The booker lady liked my stuff...so this is my first independently acquired gig.

Last week at a songwriter's circle I went to, there was a "special guest" who I had never heard of, but he played a few and he sounded good. (He was good for that Texas-Man-I-Sound-Like-George-Strait crowd). So I Googled him today and it turns out he came in second on Nashville Star a few years back. You really just never know who is floating around out here. Color me impressed. Actually, it is my new hobby to look up every musician I meet/see around town on Myspace and make them my friend. My friend list has increased quite a lot, and it's pretty cool to actually see these people in person as opposed to just hearing their streaming sound files. Reality, you can't beat it.

Tomorrow: A slew of people playing at the Cactus Cafe, including Abra Moore. Remember her one hit in the 90's? "Four Leaf Clover." Look it up, it's catchy. You know it.

Weekend Thrift Blog

Greetings from cloudy Austin. I like it that way. It fits my cloudy mood, hahahaha. Ha? Just kidding. I was blah-ing about today until I realized I have an almost finished song and two finished songs that just need that extra little spit shine of effort before they are public-worthy. Now I just need some sort of gig to play them at. Oh yeah. That.

But! But...I decided to go a'wandering this morning, and it was truly grand. I hit up the Farmer's Market, where I held off on the urge to buy some plants...but I think I will be back in the near future to add some O2 to my living quarters. It's sad when the only thing living in your apartment are you and the sugar ants. (Oh yeah, except...the current score is Jana: 2, Ants: 0. Mwahaha). Then I explored the big park in the middle of town for a brief while, and THEN I happened upon a Goodwill where I found THIS CHAIR. I lurve this chair.

Let me tell you all its finer points. Someone clearly assembled it out of the bottom of an office chair and the seat of a much cooler chair. It is perfect for guitar playing because it has no arms that I can smack into (and oh do I smack). It has adjustable height. It was SIX DOLLARS. You can't beat that.

So um, that's about it. Oh, I also found a book of Rumi poems for 2 bucks. That was also exciting. Beth will care. (Or maybe not. Blog about your house, Beth). I am off to make myself pretty so I can go see some peeps at the Waterloo Icehouse. Next door to Waterloo Records. Where I will not spend any money. Right.